Dilectus meus mihi, et ego illi, qui pascitur inter lilia…  (Canticum Canticorum, Nova Vulgata)

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I can now be addressed as Sister Marie-Thérèse.  Today I made my oblation to the monastery, at a very beautiful (and very long) mass in the abbey church.  Fr. Michael from Solesmes (I understand he’s the nephew of the late William Buckley) gave the homily, in which I was made aware of the eternal bond I’ve made with the community, and the real responsibilities that bond entails.  I really like the way he celebrates the mass, every gesture and word is full of meaning.  But that does mean that the mass takes a lot longer than normal, especially for a week day.

Almost all of the community came to parlor afterwards.  It was wonderful to stop and chat with each of the sisters (now my sisters!), even if it was only a brief exchange.  I was touched when Sr. Mary-Brigid told me that her prayer were finally answered, and that I had become her sister.  I think it was supposed to be a work day, but it seems that the AM schedule went out the window today.

Anyway, to explain my chosen name.  First of all, I ask for the patronage of Our Lady (of course.)  I especially ask her to pray for the grace of being able to say ‘yes’ the moment Our Lord makes his will known to me, and to abandon my usual habits of questioning and second-guessing.

Then I ask for the patronage of the four Theresas -  of Avila, of Lisieux,  da Cruce (Edith Stein, after reading her story, I thought I might have a chance at sainthood after all,) and Calcutta.  I need all the help I can get.

AMDG 

Vigils: 5:10 AM – 6:37 AM.

The moon is so high and bright that I am able to preserve the fading batteries in my flashlight. The birds, which had been silent on my way in, have begun their morning song.

Nootime

Sr. E’s brother (he looks about 18) was the acolyte at the mass. The fist time I’ve ever seen anyone that young on the job. In fact I kind of thought the sisters might even have a policy about that. But maybe this was a special case. Anyway it was oddly refreshing to see an altar boy attired in the jeans and sneakers that I normally see at mass (although he was somewhat embarrassed to be pressed into service without his normal attire.)

AMDG

“I cannot ope mine eyes but Thou are ready there to catch my morning soul and sacrifice.”  George Herbert

Skipped Vigils this morning, so it was 6:53 AM when I walked up the drive this morning for Laudes.  The moon was still high in the sky, and the stars were bright (maybe the day will be a clear one), but to the east behind the church was pale blue.  The shortness of the days here reminds me of how much further north I am.  The rather old-fashioned key unlocks the church for me, the two lanterns in the windows of the vestibule are lit to welcome me.  The church inside is dark except for one small light over the nun’s entrance way.  It is absolutely silent, but I can still sense the presence of the majority of the nuns on the other side of the grill, taking morning meditation.  I bow before Christ present in the tabernacle, and light a candle under the icon of Our Lady, so that she won’t be “left in darkness” as Sr LM always says.

Lauds for the feria and feast days are very simple, the antiphons and psalms are not chanted (in a monotone) rather than sung, otherwise the office would be an hour and a half rather than forty minutes, and there’s still the office of prime to be said.  But at the end of this days office Thomas of Canterbury (Becket, the martyred bishop), gets a special mention, with his own antiphon sung and a special prayer (after all, we are in England.)

After the Angelus I leave the church as the sisters begin to say the office of Prime.  Although it’s been suppressed in the Roman office, it’s still part of the horarum for the Congregation of Solesmes, so as to fit in all of the 150 psalms in one week while not making any of the other offices too long (some of them are quite long enough, thank you.)

It’s 7:50 AM, and the sky is finally light.

AMDG

A voice is heard in Ramah, lamentation and bitter weeping.  Rachel is weeping for her children; she refuses to be comforted for her children, because they are no more.  (Jeremiah 31:15 NRSV)

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A family came to mass today, parents with two teenaged children.  It was obvious that they weren’t church people, as they didn’t even know to stand for the reading of the Gospel.  But surprisingly, they were the to visit someone inside.  I thought they were tourists come to listen to the chant.  It being feast day of the slaughter of innocent children, not surprisingly Fr. Luke’s homily moved from the slaughter of two thousand years ago to the slaughter of today.  The boy looked at his sister and smiled.  “Here they go again”, the smile said, “these Catholics harping on the abortion thing.”  But it was a good opportunity to outline the Church’s teaching on abortion for those who many not know the particulars.  But I have a feeling that their dad wasn’t having it.  I wonder how they’re relating to someone they know being a cloistered nun.

We prayed for the people of Pakistan today, and through some artful wording, the soul of Benazir Bhutto.

AMDG

“delictus meus mihi et ego illi qui pascitur inter lilia”  (Canticum Canticorum Salomonis 2:16 Vulgate)

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It’s the fourth Christmas that I find myself at St. Cecilia’s Abbey to hear the beloved’s song sung and to sing it with others.  To me the antiphons of this season are the most beautiful love songs ever written.  Nothing else can compare.  And for me I think it would be very difficult to find a place where they are more beautifully sung than here.  But it’s not about the voices.  It’s about the beauty of espoused souls when they reflect the love of Christ, their Bridegroom.  During this season, when these souls sing, they tell the story of the joy of the Bride upon finding her Bridegroom.

AMDG 

 6:15 PM

The town of dueling church bells. at this moment a peal is going on at one of the churches in town, after another church just ended theirs two minutes before. But at least it’s Sunday evening. I often wonder what the neighbors around the abbey think when the bells now ring at 5:00 AM for Vigils. Oh well, they should have known what they were in for when they moved in.

6:20 PM

The second church has finished and the first church (a little farther away from met than the second, by the sound of it) is answering back.  I would never hear this in New York.

6:28 PM

The peal has just ended.  A half hour activity all together.  Seems like the Christian presence is strong here, but then again, in a town flanked by two monasteries with a convent right in the middle, it would be worrisome if that were not the case.

The church bells were ringing for half an hour this evening.  I don’t know how many were involved, but it seemed like some sort of friendly competition.  That’s what I like about this town.  The Christian presence is not afraid to make itself known.

AMDG

O Radix Jesse, qui stas in signum populorum, super quem continebunt reges os suum, quem Gentes deprecabuntur: veni ad liberandum nos, jam noli tardare.
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The short days and long nights of these northern regions seem to result in call to deeper contemplation, at least for me. That is why I come here for Christmas, to be “plunged into the mystery” as one young Nigerian nun described it. Compared to New York Ryde is small, very quiet, and offers a closeness to nature that I can’t get in the big city. I can actually see to constellations at night, and the moon lights the driveway as I walk to the church for vigils and vespers. I take long walks on the beach when the tide is out, and it seems like I might be able to walk from Ryde to Portsmouth. With God’s creation always in view, it’s easier for me to be mindful of him than when I’m back home. The interior life becomes so much more accessible.

AMDG

 “Are you he who is to come, or shall we look for another?”  (Matthew 11:3 RSV)

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Here I am in London on my way to the abbey for my fifth (fourth in a row) annual Christmas retreat.

I’m in my free hotel room (courtesy of British Air) watching BBC One and the reason for leavnig the US and coming to the UK each year is quite evident. Despite all the complaints from the British about England no longer being a Christian country, the Christian roots of this culture are far more evident here than in the US. Kids are reciting Luke’s Nativity Gospel on TV, performers are singing religious Christmas songs, and folks are saying “Happy Christmas” rather than “Happy Holidays”. There was even a bit of a debate about the practice of celebrating Christmas among British Muslims! Granted it’s all heavily commercialized and rather watered down, but at least it’s still present. This kind of celebration of the Christmas season has pretty much disappeared in the US.

AMDG

“Always be prepared to make a defense to any one who calls you to account for the hope that is in you, yet do it with gentleness and reverence” (1Peter 3:15 RSV)

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Well, my sister and I have come to a resolution of the iPod issue, I would exchange it for a non-Red iPod, but the sale wouldn’t be canceled so she could still make her contribution to the Global Fund. We have agreed to disagree on matters of faith, morals and the magisterium of the Catholic Church.

I’ve been left to consider, after our very frank exchange, that so much of what is part of my faith is completely incomprehensible to the rest of the planet. Even more so, how difficult it is for us to comprehend God’s infinite love for us, or how that love is made manifest to us in our lives.

AMDG

Archbishop Chaput on Citizenship and Evangelization

“We’re Better Americans by Being More Truly Catholic”

NEW YORK, NOV. 3, 2007 (Zenit.org).- Here is the address Archbishop Charles Chaput of Denver delivered Oct. 26 at St. John’s University School of Law in Queens, New York. The talked is titled “Church and State Today: What Belongs to Caesar, and What Doesn’t.”

Cutting to the end of his address -

It’s time for all of us who claim to be “Catholic” to recover our Catholic identity as disciples of Jesus Christ and missionaries of his Church. In the long run, we serve our country best by remembering that we’re citizens of heaven first. We’re better Americans by being more truly Catholic — and the reason why, is that unless we live our Catholic faith authentically, with our whole heart and our whole strength, we have nothing worthwhile to bring to the public debates that will determine the course of our nation.

Pluralism in a democracy doesn’t mean shutting up about inconvenient issues. It means speaking up — respectfully, in a spirit of justice and charity, but also vigorously and without apologies. Jesus said that we will know the truth, and the truth will make us free. He didn’t say anything about our being popular with worldly authority once we have that freedom. In the end, if we want our lives to be fruitful, we need to know ourselves as God intends us to be known — as his witnesses on earth, not just in our private behavior, but in our public actions, including our social, economic and political choices.

If pagan Rome could be won for Jesus Christ, surely we can do the same in our own world. What it takes is the zeal and courage to live what we claim to believe. All of us here tonight already have that desire in our hearts. So let’s pray for each other, and encourage each other, and get down to the Lord’s work.

The entire address can be found here.